I find myself in my grandmother's dining room - apparently, I have stopped by for a random visit. I haven't seen or talked to her in over six years ... I am feeling very nervous, as I am unaware of how she and the rest of my family there will respond to my return*. I nervously look around, scanning the area for any changes. The dining room is just how I left it, which is comforting for some reason. I am now glancing out the sliding door, and notice that the deck is no longer there - in its place is a dark, wooden, spiral staircase. This set up doesn't make sense to me and it's certainly not what I'm used to, but I do realize that a lot can change in six years. I'm walking outside, onto the landing and down the stairs. I see that these stairs lead to a deck that is attached to the swimming pool. Granny has always had a swimming pool, but it used to be out in the yard, much further back than this - it must have been a lot of work to move it. I am looking beyond the yard in an attempt to see if there is anything new where the pool used to be, and to my astonishment, there is a mountain range! Not only were they way too close to be realistic, but there are no mountains in this state - the land is totally flat! The mountains are shaking all of a sudden, and I don't know what to think! They look like they're crumbling and about to fall back into the ground ... (could this have been me close to becoming lucid?)
I am now turned the opposite way, facing my cousin who has just entered the scene. I feel annoyed at her presence, but am not entirely sure why. (I feel like it might have something to do with the fact that she interrupted the mountain scene combined with the fact that she's one of the family members that I want little to do with) I am following her back inside, but am finding myself in the den this time. ('the den' is what my grandmother calls her 'family room', as opposed to the living room which isn't used as casually) I see my Granny over on the couch, and am trying to decide how close I should sit to her. I have this urge to snuggle up to her as I did when I was a child, but should I? Is she mad at me for not keeping in touch? Would it be more appropriate to explain myself first? She deserves to know that it has nothing to do with her personally, and it was the best way I could see at the time to deal with the situation. But ...I don't want to explain myself ... I have a lot to say, but nothing I can say to her, in light of everything else. I just want her to know that despite the way it's seemed, I love and have missed her tremendously. Suddenly, I'm cuddled up next to her, not worried about a thing. She embraces me and tells me that she's missed me.
At some point, characters switched and I am no longer on the couch with Granny. I am still in her den, but on the couch with me is my boyfriend, Pam (a girl who isn't very fond of me IRL) and her boyfriend. I am curious as to why we are all six hours away from home at Granny's house. I'm also starting to feel nervous, as I'm not sure that being around Pam is such a good idea ...
We are now all in the deli where I work. I'm not working though now though, and we all are just hanging out in the far corner by the food service prep table. (IRL, this is where I hide occasionally while on the clock when I need a little, unofficial break
) The guys have vanished into the kitchen, leaving Pam and I alone. I have no idea what to say to her ... but as I am looking at her, I notice that she doesn't look like herself; she's not wearing glasses, her hair is longer and blond, her eyes are a greyish-blue as opposed to their usual hazel-color, and she's wearing make-up. The more I look, the more I see that she's hardly recognizable - but I know it's her because of her ears (I've always found Pam to be attractive, but in the plain and simple sort of way. Her hair is also actually dark, she never wears make-up and always wears her glasses. Also, there's nothing funny about her ears ... but it made perfect sense in the dream!) and who she's dating.My friend Shelly is also here with us ... I wonder why I didn't notice her before? Was she always there ... or did she just appear? Anyway, Pam is focused on Shelly, but I guess talking to the both of us, technically. She's venting about how the guys are arguing about something in the kitchen, and how ridiculous it is - small talk to pass the time. I'm sure thankful Shelly is here with us, because otherwise, it would be uncomfortable, I think. I wonder if Pam feels the same?
Wait, now where did Shelly go?? I'm feeling uncomfortable again, so I look at Pam and am distracted, once again, by how different she looks. I always thought she was hot in her own way, but I seriously can't stop looking at her now... I'm even feeling slightly jealous. I'm finding myself much closer to her, and am placing my hands on her shoulders, looking her in the eyes ... she seems to be responding positively to this. I am fighting an urge to make-out with her ... I really want to, but that would be inappropriate! What's wrong with me? How would she react? "You are so pretty ...I seriously can't stop looking at you ...", I tell her, with my hands still on her shoulders as I'm backing up slightly, trying to hide the fact that I was just about to kiss her. She seems surprised, and goes on to explain how she thinks I am extremely attractive, and holds up a mirror to my face. I didn't want to look for some reason, but I did anyway, I saw my face in the mirror, which was an odd experience. (I don't think I've ever seen my face in a dream before ...)
***
*Note: IRL, I have chosen to have very little interaction with that side of the family. Despite the solid reasoning behind that decision, I do experience occasional episodes of guilt as a result of having to leave behind a couple of good people along with the bad majority. This dream is likely a way for my mind to solve that issue of guilt.
**It should also be noted that I have always been disappointed with Pam's 'girl-hate' toward me because, that aside, she is someone I've felt that I could easily connect with for various reasons. I think this dream was also a way for my mind to cope with that issue, since I find blind hate to be unfortunate when it's coming from someone I'd otherwise enjoy spending time with.
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